Echo Ninja
by Tachibana Azrael Chikoku
Summary: Tentative title. Naru is lazy, carefree and always in a I-don't-give-a-damn attitude. She's also hates work. So how and why in hell did she become a ninja? Rated T for language.
1. Introducing Naru: Lazy Ass Ninja

Azrael: YO, new fic.

Naru: Shouldn't you work on your other ones?

Naruto: LIKE MINE?

Azrael: I'm reconstructing yours.

Naruko: And mine?

Azrael: Writers block. Now go appease the tribe with the author's note dumbass or Rei's coming out.

Naruto: Fine fine.

A/N: My third Naruto fic and second FemNaru. As like my other story (at first) this is more of a test trial and will update if I get good responses or if I get off my lazy ass and write it. As for pairings a yuri can work (and if you're reading Kage Husha Hinata is a definite candidate, and a real good one) though I'm considering bisexuality as it does fit her personality in a sense. Anyways enjoy!

Naruto: There, now sacrifice me as usual.

Azrael: Nah, they're calm now.

Naruto: How the hell did you managed that?

Outside were two figures labeled Pein and Minato being sacrificed.

Disclaimer: You know the legal crap. I don't own jack and no point suing someone who's flat broke. No point suing someone who can sic a blue haired tree hugging psycho on you either.

Legend

"…normal…"

"…_thoughts…"_

* * *

**Chapter 01: Introducing Uzumaki Naru: Lazy-Ass Ninja of Konoha**

The Academy, the starting point of all ninjas. Here aspiring ninjas train here with the hopes that they may become accomplished ninjas. Though more often than not they never expect their aspiring ninjas to be…well for the lack of better words…different.

"NARUKO, PAY ATTENTION!" yelled Iruka.

"Ugh…do I have to?" said Naru groggily.

"I'm announcing teams here so stop snoring!"

"Fine fine."

Uzumaki Naru (full name Naruko but most people call her Naru) is by no means an ordinary girl. Hell she's no generic Uzumaki Naruto. For starters she's lazy, carefree, and always in an I-don't-really-care-about…well-anything attitude. She also lives up to the meaning of Naru in that whatever insult, complement, etc., that people throw at her it bounces off of her like an echo.

Her light blonde hair goes as far as her lower back and tied in a low ponytail while her sides are braided and covered in cloth. Other notable features include her dark blue eyes, usually either in a daze or sleepy or in a less-than-eager-about-anything look, behind purple wire-framed glasses. Even though she's the type to openly turn down any form of flirting towards her with fearful (and by fearful I mean they are scared of her) annoyance in the form of passiveness she is undoubtedly the most wanted and cutest girl in the class. And because of that the boys (and some girls) organized their own (secret) Naru Fan Club; with a few of them having a meganekko fetish (they're in the Konoha Megane Lovers Club).

Her clothes consist of a simple sleeveless shirt with blue pants and earrings. The blade that she carries around though is unique in the fact that it's dull, rusted, chipped, old, and well beyond the point that it can be maintained. The only reason she keeps it around is because not only is there's something special about it or that it hasn't broken in pieces when anything comes in contact with it but that it was her mother's prized possession and the last thing that has any connection to her.

Anyways…

"Team Seven, consisting of Uchiha Sasuke, Inuzuka Kiba, and Tachibana Chikara, your instructor will be Enryuu Itoko." declared Iruka.

"Oh great, I'm with the Uchiha?" groaned Chikara.

Tachibana Chikara, as her name says, is bright and energetic but also prone to violent moods due to her hobby of watching violent movies. Along with her fraternal twin brother Chikoku (in detail later) and Naruko they make up the kenjutsu practitioners in the class. Other traits include her Chinese-style clothing, her unique figure, and her heterochromatic eyes (blue on her left and red on the other). In terms of other abilities her skills in feminine things in general range from terrible to craptastically horrible.

"You got a problem with me Tachibana?" said Sasuke.

"You damn right, I rather be with Naru and Nii-sama." said Chikara.

"Whatever." brooded Sasuke.

"Team Eight, consisting of Hyuuga Hinata, Haruno Sakura, and Yamanaka Ino, your instructor will be Yuuhi Kurenai." declared Iruka. Only thing worth noting is that Hinata is a closet lesbian/pervert in denial and Sakura openly admits she doesn't like Sasuke.

"SCORE! I'M NOT WITH UCHIHA!" yelled Inner Sakura.

"Team Ten, consisting of Nara Shikamaru, Aburame Shino, and Akimichi Chouji, your instructor is Sarutobi Asuma…Team Fourteen, consisting of Uzumaki Naruko, Tachibana Chikoku, and Sanada Yoshihiro…where's Tachibana and Sanada and NARUKO WILL YOU PLEASE WAKE UP!" yelled Iruka.

"ZZZ…OW!" Naru snoozed before she slipped off her hand and landed hard on the table.

"Yo, where's Team Seven." said a voice. Everyone looked to the window to see what appears to be a 12 year-old girl with a hitai-ate worn on her. "Name Enryuu Itoko so come over here Team Seven."

Enryuu Itoko may act mature but often she's twisted and loves to screw around with people's heads, traits carried over from her mother. Though the most striking feature about her is that…

"Dude, she's 12!" yelled out a random student.

…she hasn't aged since she was 12, which makes it tough for her since she's really 26. And it really makes it annoying that she can't drink without somebody lecturing her or that her tolerance is the equivalent of a 12-year old. And even worse is that not only can she get a date but she's also a virgin. Of course she still has her health and her abilities are well beyond Jonin capable.

Among the comments said…

"Is she's really my teacher? Don't make me laugh. She's too short to be one!" scoffed Kiba.

"She's too weak to be my teacher." said Sasuke.

"My recommendation is to leave right now Inuzuka and Uchiha because Itoko hate that kind of insults." said Naru passively.

"Why?" Both said.

"3…2…1…"

Immediately Itoko went in front of Sasuke and grabbed his head. She then went in front of Kiba and grabbed his head. She then gave both of them a fierce vice grip.

"Ooh the Iron Claw. We haven't seen that in a while." said Chikara gleefully.

"_Is that even acceptable Jonin teacher qualities?" _was on everybody's (except Naru and Chikara) mind. Another thought in everyone's mind was Itoko's resemblance to Naru, especially the fact she could be her younger sister (Naru does look a little older).

"Yo Naru, are you any way related to that Itoko?" asked Shikamaru while the other students listened on.

"Itoko is my itoko (cousin, and take an easy guess where I got the pun from)." said Naru which confused everyone who heard.

"Now now Itoko-senpai, there's no need to use force." said Iruka.

"UNCLE! UNCLE!" yelled and struggled both Kiba and Sasuke.

"Good. Now meet me at Training Ground 12 Chikara. Oh and Naru, we're having curry tonight." Itoko jumped out of the classroom with Sasuke and Kiba under her grip. Chikara followed her.

"Nice." said Naru passively, though it's tough to tell if she's thrilled about it.

"Yo, where the hell is is Uzumaki Naruko." yelled out a Jonin from the doorway while dragging what appears to be a sleeping boy looking exactly like Chikara and another boy unconscious from what it appears to be multiple pails to the head.

"Ah, you found Chikoku and Yoshihiro Ken-san." said Iruka.

Gekiretsu Kengeki, Ken for short, is a man of 25 who carries a curved dao with a disc shaped guard on his belt with a kris dagger on the back of his pants. Notable traits include a scar running down his left eye and tribal tattoos on his left arms going across his chest. In terms of clothes his Jonin vest is nothing more than a green ragged opened vest with nothing under, san bandages, with ragged blue pants on, giving him an appearance of a thug. Also of note is the broken cigarette in his mouth and his thumb that he uses as a lighter.

"This one was flat-out sleeping in the middle of the hallway while this one got knocked out by wooden pails." said Ken.

"Ugh, Ero-Yoshi was peeping again?" said the whole (female) student body.

"It wasn't…my fault…" groggily said Yoshi.

"Zzz…nee-sama…5 more minutes…" snoozed Chikoku.

Tachibana Chikoku is Chikara's (younger) twin brother but unlike her he's serious, often late (as his name implies), and frequently sleeps (he's a narcoleptic and is the main reason why he's late). Besides a kenjutsu practitioner he wears more loose-fitting clothing, has heterochromatic eyes (blue on his right, red on the left), and is the only one who can stomach his sister's bad cooking without going to the hospital. More often than not people often confuse him with his sister (minus the eyes they're practically alike despite being fraternal) which annoys him to no end. His high quality skills in feminine things don't help either.

Sanada Yoshihiro though can pass off as Jiraiya's perfect apprentice with the added ability to guess a girl's measurements with supreme accuracy. Unlike Jiraiya though he does not peep at other girls as he's an honorable pervert. Unfortunately his terrible sense of direction often leads 

to places he does not want to go (hot springs, bathhouses, etc.) which is usually the reason why girls, including Naru, hates him.

"Can we make this quick, this is getting boring." said Naru.

"Yeah, meet me on the roof."

--

"Let's go with introducing ourselves. Name's Gekiretsu Kengeki, Ken for short. I really don't know what I like and I have no clue what I hate. My hobbies are not of your concern and I guess I have no dreams." Ken said though no one was paying attention since Chikoku is still asleep, Naru is reading a book (i.e. Romance of the Three Kingdoms…and I so want to read it…) with locked green eyes, and Yoshihiro is partially unconscious. "Damn it all." Picking up a rock he threw it at Chikoku.

"Ow, son of a…" Chikoku swore before taking a look at his surroundings. "Where the hell am I?"

"On top of the roof. Name's Ken and I'm your Jonin teacher. Now introduce yourself before I chuck this big one." Ken said while holding up a big rock labeled For Annoyances Only.

"Fine. I'm Tachibana Chikoku. My likes include sleeping and cooking. I really hate it when people confuse me for a girl. My hobbies are daydreaming and thinking of various scenarios in my head. My dream is to live out my days mastering The Art of Life." said Chikoku.

"Good." Ken then threw a rock at Yoshihiro, though wasn't required since he's fully conscious now.

"You didn't have to throw it." complained Yoshi as he rubbed his aching head.

"Yeah, I just felt like it. Introduce yourself."

"I'm Sanada Yoshihiro. Most people know what I like. I hate when people confuse me for a regular run-of-the-mill perv (I'm freaking honorable) and that my lack of sense of direction leads me to places I don't want to go to. My hobbies are writing and my dream is to one day become the ultimate adult lit. writer ever!"

"Jeez." He then threw the For Annoyances Only rock at Naru but she catches it easily. He did catch her attention. "Introduce yourself brat."

"Name's Sadojima Akari. I like reading, I hate being disturbed, my hobby is reading, and my dream is own a library now shut up I'm reading." 'Akari' said. Chikoku gave her a two finger strike while taking her book.

"Turn back to Naru Akari." Chikoku said.

"…ch, whatever. Uzumaki Naruko. I don't feel like telling you what I like, I'm not motivated to tell you what I hate, I'm too lazy to tell you my hobbies, and my dreams are something I'm not interested to tell you." Naru said uninterested.

"Here." Chikoku said while handing her back her book. Immediately she reverted to Akari.

"_I got a Perv, a narcoleptic, and an unmotivated female version of a Nara with Multiple Personality Disorder. Kakashi wasn't kidding when he didn't choose to become a Jonin teacher this year. Forget the teamwork training; they need further proof if they deserve to be ninjas._ Okay so far my analysis of you guys is that…YOU'RE ALL FREAKING USELESS!"

"And this is news how?" said Akari.

"Since none of you have any potential of being Genin, we're starting back from square one and testing whether or not you deserve to be Genin."

"So, the academy all over again?"

"Nope, Ken's Academy for the Useless/Marine Corp. Style Boot Camp. Once I'm done with you your own spirits will yearn for even Ibiki's torture." exaggerated Ken.

"Ibiki?" asked Yoshi.

"Konoha's Interrogation Specialist. Not very intimidating." Akari said.

"Anyways meet me there at 0700 hours. Dismissed." Ken disappeared in a cloud of smoke.

"See you tomorrow Naru." said Chikoku.

"Yeah, later. Oh and don't walk in the public baths as last time Sanada." Naru warned as she fixed her glasses.

"I told you already, it wasn't my fault!" yelled Yoshi.

* * *

A/N: And there you go. Review and later whenever cowboys…

**Jutsu List:**

**None**


	2. The Teacher and Training from Hell

A/N: Sorry for the wait, I've been having some issues about my writing. Mostly motivation and stuff that for some reason my hands won't type. I've also doing original work but because of how I always come up with new ideas I haven't gone past the first chapter of either. Anyways whatever I said in the previous chapter about the story potentionally being a yuri fic I'm nixing them completely. I got my pairing planned out and nothing can change it. The others I thought up can go into hentai or something. Well enjoy!

A/A/N: For those wondering D&R is still in rewriting phase. Almost done with next chapter though.

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto. I don't own Ninja Warrior. I own two Raiho plushies, a factory wrapped Teddie, and Aigis and Metis fanart that will make you DAW (not mine in the sense that I can't draw anything outside swords and weapons).

Legend

"…normal…"

"…_thoughts…"_

* * *

_The three with nothing to gain for_

_Nothing to fight for_

_Nothing to dream for_

_Their desires though_

_Are simply for themselves_

_And nothing more_

**Chapter Two: The Teacher and Training from Hell**

Konoha has this thing when it comes to Genin. They simply don't stick them on missions right away as that itself is pure suicide. They test them instead to make sure they are capable of being Genin. Those who pass become real Genin. Those who fail go back to the Academy or something. Interestingly they didn't bother with how the Jonin teacher is going to test them. And more often than not the guinea pigs end up with a sadistic teacher who has no qualms about wasting explosives…fufufu…

---

That afternoon…

"My arms…my legs…my everything." pained Yoshi.

"For once I agree." said Chikoku, rubbing his spine.

"Eh, Itoko done worse." shrugged Naru with charred sleeves, rubbing her left arm.

"You got it worse and yet you take it as nothing." said Yoshi.

"I said Itoko done worse."

---

Flashback…0600 hours…

"ZZZ." snoozed and drooled the Genin hopeful. At least Tachibana is partially awake.

Ken arrived and with a bugle in hand blared _Reveille_ at their heads. All three Genin jumped up and he yelled. "GOOD MORNING IDIOTS!"

"OY, WHAT GIVES?" yelled Yoshi.

"Dammit Nee-sama, I'm deaf." Chikoku said, obviously still sleepy.

Naru showed nothing but sleepy and annoyed eyes while rubbing her ears.

"Is she's okay?" asked Ken.

"She's…annoyed. Her fan club and Yoshi does this to her on a regular basis. Especially him." Chikoku pointed at Yoshi.

"It's too early to make a rebuttal. Just tell us what we're going to do." said Yoshi through half-asleep eyes.

"That is your test." Ken pointed down the hill and revealed an obstacle course that would make Sasuke (the show not pigeon) proud. Wasn't hastily built last minute either.

"An obstacle course?" said Yoshi.

"What kind of course is this?" said Chikoku.

"Pointless." said Naru.

"Your test is simple. Cross it under 140 seconds, that's all. Fall in the water or time runs out and you got to do it over again from the start. It's as simple as that."

"Simple? We have to pass this under 3 minutes! Not only that but that course is meant mainly for agility as well as strength. And us three don't really fit that category that well." Yoshi pointed at the three of them.

"What the hell are you talking about? I'm plenty quick!" argued Chikoku.

"You two here." Ken throws them a piece of metal. They catch it.

"The heck this for?" said both Chikoku and Yoshi. Ken snaps his finger and both get a fierce electrical shock that non-fatally shocks them.

"First rule of complaining about the course…do not complain about the course. Your imput Uzumaki?"

"I know when to shut up." replied Naru. _"He has too much time on his hands."_

"Good. Sanada, you're first."

"Can't I recover first?" said a fried Yoshi.

"You want another surprise?"

"I'm up!" Yoshi immediately got up and face the course.

**Sanada Stage One: Incline Drop**

"UGAAAH!" Yoshi yelled as he used the zip line to propel himself downwards. "Couldn't we learn about the course ahead of time?"

"What's the point? That makes it too easy and a ninja has to expect the unexpected."

"_He has a point."_ admitted Chikoku and Naru.

**Sanada Stage Two: Brick Wall Climb**

The object of the stage is to kick off the wall and jump to their left to a pad…unfortunately…

CRACK! A sickening crunch was heard when Yoshi collided headfirst into the wall. He peeled off and belly flopped in the water.

"Oooh, that's gotta hurt." commented Chikoku.

Naruko analyzed the layout of the course. "This course is meant for dodging, thinking on the spot, and causing as much pain as possible."

"Uzumaki got it right. I designed it solely on that Sanada kid. Figured all that abuse he endured gotta be worth something."

"So what's ours?"

"Tachibana, yours is over there."

**Tachibana Stage One: Hammer Pendulum**

"Jeez are these real?!" complained Chikoku as he dodged a hammer.

"Training mean jack if it's fake. NOW GO!"

"HOW! I'M TRYING…" Chikoku got cut off as a hammer connected with him and sent him into the water.

"His course is based solely so he's fully active and not sleeping."

"Good eye. And it's only the first stage._ Weird, I designed the course solely out of pure sadistic enjoyment._"

"But why the water?"

"This is as far I can make it to be considered 'humane'. Apparently fire pits don't cut it."

"…you're evil."

"Not really. I was considering using explosive tags."

"…"

"Your turn Uzumaki. I don't go easy on females and Sanada on the third stage."

"There better be no explosives."

"Don't worry it's only slightly more work than whatever the shrimp has on her regimen,"

"It can't be that worse can it?" commented Yoshi as nearly got hit by rocks.

Chikoku responds with a blue face.

**---**

Itoko on her end wasn't any better.

"KEEP MOVING IDIOTS!" cheered Itoko. Idiots on her end refers to Sasuke, Kiba, and Chikara (who assumed she gets it easier) tugging a cart full of rocks with her on it.

"Isn't…this…slave…labor?" struggled Kiba.

"No slave labor is illegal. This is certified training."

"What part…of…this…is certified…"struggled Sasuke.

"Don't complain…dumbasses. She'll pile on…more work." struggled Chikara.

"10 MORE LAPS AND 5 MORE KILOS! AFTER THAT WE'RE BUNNY HOPPING ON STONE STEPS!" cheered Itoko.

The Genin hopeful groaned loudly.

**---**

**Uzumaki Stage One: Mine Field**

Ken lied.

"YOU SAID NO EXPLOSIVES!" yelled Naru.

"I lied and I really hate wasting tags."

"YOU'RE THE ABSOLUTE WORST TEACHER EVER!!!" All three yelled while Yoshi had to go through spike traps, Chikoku through spiked walls, and Naru through more explosives.

---

Noon and the farthest the three got without food was halfway. Yeah the course is short of _I Wanna Be The Guy. _Yoshi is soaked and muddy and with needles from **Stage 4: Needle Rain**. Chikoku is black and bruised with numerous cut marks from narrowly evading **Stage 4: Buzzsaw Pendulum**. And Naru is muddy and scorched and partially smoking from **Stage 5: Explosive Arrows, **though in her case she avoided falling in to prevent herself from getting blown up. Their expressions remain sour.

"Break time."

"Finally. Can we eat?"

"Hell no. You're gonna puke after this." The trio groaned. "Tough luck, on the fields you can barely eat every two days."

"Ugh…makes you wonder why we chose to become ninjas in the first place." said Chikoku.

"Indeed. More sleep for us." commented Naru.

"That's true." said Yoshi.

"I never expected to have to teach a team so lethargic about work, much less duty as ninja." groaned Ken.

"You never met us." said Yoshi simply.

"Here's one question: what is your purpose for becoming ninja?" asked Ken.

"No point, I'd rather practice writing this book I'm trying out than become a ninja."

"There's no point, I would rather live my days observing life than taking it own."

"Pointless, don't really care."

"Then why bother wasting your time becoming ninjas?"

"I can't make money with my skills. I haven't developed that much being a writer. And I have a better chance earning it by being a ninja."

"Chikara-neesama wanted to become a ninja so I might as well. Besides grandma's forcing me to do this and I really don't want to go against that."

"Itoko forcing me. You should know why."

"No I don't. _But there's more to it than that_. Anyways I may have found a reason to teach you guys."

"So what was the point of those obstacles?" asked the three.

"Mostly to see you guys in pain." The three glared at him. "It's the truth. And the other part is to see whether or not you have any physical worth."

"So we're an official team now?" said Chikoku.

"More or less. But keep this in mind. Unlike Kakashi who test teamwork I test your ability as individual ninja. Besides you three have good teamwork anyways."

"And yet they paired me up with Ero-Yoshi." Naru shot a dirty look at Yoshi.

"A woman's grudge last forever." sighed Yoshi.

"Probably. NOW HOP TO IT AND FINISH THE COURSE FROM STAGE ONE!"

One Chinese Proverb states: _Three reeking tanners (are enough to) overcome one Zhuge Liang._ (Three incapable people can overcome one capable person). Apparently Luo Guanzhong neglected the unpredictable Jonin factor since he promptly tossed them into the mine field.

End Flashback…

---

"Sigh…I shouldn't took the job." sighed Ken.

"Yo Ken, how's life as a Jonin teacher." said a 24 year-old Jonin.

"I'd rather do guard work Celine." said Ken.

"Man, if you're saying that your team must be terrible."

"I got that walking perv who can't differentiate between left and right, a narcoleptic with a possible sister complex and the Kyuubi-gaki with more than one personality. That's why I tossed pointed projectiles at Sanada, blades at Tachibana, and explosives at Uzumaki."

"Ouch, you got the Sanada kid and the Uzumaki kid."

"Yeah. I 'm concerned with the fact that those three have no ambition to do anything as ninjas."

"How so?"

"Sanada says he rather write, Tachibana rather study the art of life, and I can't get a straight answer out of Uzumaki. They're becoming ninjas because someone/something forcing them to do so. But I have a gut feeling there's something else that forcing them to become ninjas."

"Any idea why?"

"I don't have enough information to answer that. Oh well I did get to use that. Hehehe…"

---

"Let us never mention the final round ever again." said Yoshi.

"Agreed." said Chikoku and Naru.

"Well at least we're going to do missions which mean we get paid." said Yoshi.

"That's a plus I guess. Still it would be more convenient if I was paired up with Chikara-neesama." said Chikoku.

"Okay, one of these days somebody going to help you with that sister complex you have."

"I don't have a complex."

"Duck." Naru ducked.

"Why?" Both of their questions were answered when they barely ducked and nearly impaled from a barrage of bamboo skewers flying left and a barrage of spatulas flying right.

"Ha Ayame! This is the day I will beat you!" said a blonde bakery girl across Ichiraku.

"You think so Megumi? I will be the one to beat you!" said Ayame, now energetic and somewhat violent.

Both Megumi and Ayame flared up with their fighting instinct emanating from them.

"Naru, what up with them."

"It's like this all the time, it's a regular thing."

"This is no regular thing, even if this is gonna be a great catfight." Yoshi's head connected with the ground by an annoyed Naru.

"It's a regular thing Shameless."

"LET'S GO!" Both Megumi and Ayame were about to charge at each other with skewers in Megumi's hands and spatulas in Ayame's. Unfortunately their respective mothers knocked them out rather violently.

"STOP FOOLING AROUND AND GET BACK TO WORK!" both of them yelled. Both then dragged their bodies back inside their respective restaurants.

"Err…want to eat barbecue Naru?" said Chikoku.

"That would be wise. It's about to get hectic right now." said Naru.

"How hectic can it get?" Yoshi muffled through dirt.

---

"And what about their teamwork?"

"I haven't gauged them for that yet. But I can tell Uzumaki and Tachibana are willing to team up. If only I can pair them up with Sanada."

"Ah."

"Yup. Tachibana has nothing against him but Sanada has made an enemy out of practically every female in the village. Uzumaki is no exception. But I can make them work together, either that or force them to fight in a fight club."

"That's too extreme Ken. And I know which one you're referring to."

"If it comes down to it I will have to force them to join. And besides I'm guessing one of Uzumaki's personalities is more than willing to jump in."

"Knowing her she'll give new meaning to the rule: _You do not talk about fight club._"

"I thought you hated those kinds of clubs."

"I do but I have to be aware of the underground clubs around here. I don't want something like…_that_ happening again."

"You got that right."

* * *

A/N: And there you go. Remember to review; I'm aiming for a 5 per chapter average but happy enough with one for reasons unknown. Later cowboys…


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